Don't Blink

After completing our first year of seminary and all the unforeseen challenges that came with it, we were so excited to embark on a week-long vacation. We visited the Outer Banks of North Carolina for the first time. It was every bit as wonderful as everyone said it would be. Our beach house was just over the dunes from some cool and active surf. I did a lot of beach combing and collected some beautiful shells. This vacation had a special significance in the life our family because it was our penultimate summer vacation before our oldest daughter enters adulthood and heads off to college. Ironically, our beach house was named, "Just Blink." That is about all we have done, and now our first born is nearly an adult. I have always said that having a baby boy as my girls were entering into the teenage years was the best thing I could have done to help me cope with it all. Someone still lets me know how much I am needed and adored. I am savoring every minute of the short time I have with him as a baby and toddler. I just blinked and now he is a preschooler. I wish I didn't blink so much when the girls were younger. Children are such a blessing and a gift. Don't blink!

Earth Baby

America, for all its strengths, can be a bit behind the times. At our small school, word traveled fast that baby Emmett had been born. We had not advertised the fact that we were planning to have him at home with a midwife, possibly in water. I wanted to play it by ear on the water birth, so I didn’t rent the expensive birthing pool. My midwife assured me that my oversized bathtub would work just fine. Of course, word traveled just as fast that “he was born in the bathtub!” Some of the younger kids were confused and asked if I knew he was going to be born when I got in.

I’m enjoying the Shopaholic series. I’m currently reading Shopaholic and Baby. I love the part where she finds out about a celebrity holistic doctor who does water birth with lotus leaves and Thai massage. The point is, in London I would be hip.

It seemed the natural progression that I should consider cloth diapers. So I found this fab website that has all kinds of natural, organic products. They even have cloth swim diapers, which I know will start saving me money almost immediately. As far as the diapers, let’s just say they aren’t cheap. They are cute and kind to the environment. Honestly, I am NOT turning into a shopaholic. If worst comes to worst, I can always sell stuff on ebay. Happy Earth Day!

Train Up a Child

My last 11 years of child rearing have been quite a learning experience. The first thing I learned was that they sure have minds of their own! My newfangled psychological ideas quickly went out the window and we went to the right place, the Bible. The only problem was that we mistakenly believed a few pastor/published author types would have a better spin on clear biblical teaching than, well, clear biblical teaching.

We learned a lot from a few wise pastors. My favorite parenting book is Shepherding a Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp. Methods have their place, but we’ve found the loopholes in all the methods. Tripp’s book is probably the least methods-oriented of our collection, but I can still see the cookie cutter forming as the greater context of God’s example to His children in scripture is not applied.

The scriptures are clear: children need consistent, loving discipline. But it is interesting—God’s example to His children is one of extreme patience and a lot of natural consequences. So based on the age of the child in question, we try to balance these two approaches. I am also careful not to be a nag. Obedience is not optional in our house; therefore, I don’t nit-pick. Their lives shouldn’t be a burden, and I don’t want to set them up to fail. Isn’t that the idea of the Ten Commandments? Ten is enough, thank you very much!

My biggest challenge (no doubt due to my compliant, people-pleasing nature) has always been the patience. I literally thought I could produce very well-behaved children without much effort. I had no idea how hard it would be and how loosely I would have to apply the term, well-behaved. Back when I just had two and Pookie was at the height of her toddler rebellion, I said to TM, "I’m so discouraged! Douglas Wilson said that you can make your child stop doing anything if you just discipline them right away every time they do it for three days. That’s what I’ve been trying to do for about 2 years now!" Then my astute husband gave me the best parenting advice I have ever heard. He reminded me that the Bible says in Proverbs 22:6, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." The Bible said OLD! It didn’t say in three days. Now those are some expectations I can live with.